FROM RUSSIA FOR MONEY
EasyMidget's all-new mail-order bride service

Attention wife-shoppers! We have a great sale going on in Aisle 3: All Russian brides must go! Slashing prices on all Russian brides!

After reading all your desperate emails, EasyMidget has finally broken down and established the genuine mail-order Russian bride service our readers have been demanding! We've heard your urgent love-beacon and we're answering! Allow us to introduce these lovely marriage-minded Russian women to you at a cost you'll most likely find questionable. Don't ask us where we found them, just take a look at this small sampling of the lovely women we can offer you:

Your Peter will be Great after sampling our terrific assortment of Russian brides:

Olga, 36 My name is Olga. I am 36 years old Russian beauty. I love cook clean and sex all night. Let me show you Russian warmth. I promise not for running away once I get to Amerika. I will shovel driveway for snow.

Irina, 23 Greetings, rich sexy American! I am sexy body with love to dance for you. I don't care about your beer belly like picky American hottie. I love your ugly face forever! Pick me! Pick me!

Tatayana, 40 I wish to eat potatoes and bread and water with my vodka. I will love you like boiled potato!

Yuliya, 44 I am loving ice princess! Do not listen to these other women. I am one for you. I like American penis with my powerful thighs like horse! I love America and your boxing Rocky movies. In America I read books that tell streets are paved with real gold. I cannot wait to shop at your Beverly Hills and your fabulous Wal-Mart stores.

Elizaveta, 50 Please. I am very hungry. I must work at brothel for hot soup to eat unless you love me. I have saggy breasts and old run-down vulva but I still love you American man and your Rolls Royce cars and will have many children for you and eat hot soup!

Oksana, 33 Hello. I love to come to live American dream. I have husband here in St. Petersburg but you are my true love. I will not send your money to my loving family in Russia. I love you even if we live near Cleveland.

Yelena, 50 I work in circus with juggling bear. I love for you to love to feel my beautiful chin-hairs against your warm American lips! I will love for you your beard as well!

Yessica, 28 Come let us make love while we are listening to Scorpions "Winds of Change" great rock and roll. Then you dress me up in your American blue jeans and go for ride on your shiny motorcycle.

Katerina, 33 I have wound from great war in Chechnya refugee camp but it is very sexy. I will let you touch my stump-limb if you bring me to Amerikan country and take me to see "Titanic" at motion picture theater!

Svetlana, 39 I love to find exotic American man with mustache like my eyebrow and eat at American McDonalds burgers!

Well, there you have it. These lovely ladies are just looking for the chance of a lifetime and you're their ticket to ride. The Cold War is over and its time to get Hot — Russian Lady Hot!

Don't just look at these stunning women... let us know how you feel about them! Send correspondence to xxx@easymidget.com!

Mail-order brides shipping rates: Overnight: $399 | 2-day Express: $249 | Standard Ground: $99 |
(EasyMidget assumes no responsibility if brides die in transit. This is why we recommend the overnight option.)

Sorry, no CODs.